What I Read in November 2018

It's book talk time!

I still feel a little book-slumpy. Some months I can blow through 12-14 books, no problem, and other months, reading feels like a slog. I do tend to pick up with my reading after the holidays pass, so I'm definitely crossing my fingers that that happens again this year. :) It doesn't help that right now, I'm reading an incredibly information-dense book on religion. It's interesting, but slow-going because there's so much information to process- plus the book is over 500 pages. I may be reading this for a while...

Anywhere, here's what I read in November this year.


1. The Marrying of Chani Kaufman- Eve Harris

An interesting novel about the lives of a group of ultra-Orthodox Jews (I recently listened to a podcast which featured a rabbi from one of these sects; he prefers the term Haredi or Charedi, although I don't know if that's universal or if it differs between the sects). Chani is nervous over her upcoming wedding to a man with whom she's barely had a handful of conversations; Rivka, the wife of the group's rabbi, feels claustrophobic in her life. All the unknowns in Chani's future are contrasted with the twists and turns of Rivka's past that have brought her to this point, and I deeply enjoyed learning Rivka's story (which wasn't quite what I'd expected).

The reviews on Goodreads are mixed, which surprised me. I enjoyed the look into a world I wouldn't normally otherwise get to see or learn about, and some of the reviews seem unnecessarily harsh (one woman is criticizing the author for her characters wondering about bacon, which, of course, is forbidden by the Jewish kashrut laws. "They wonder about bacon," the reviewer says. "Because another culture's diet is REALLY what a curious person would think about." Uh...I find other culture's diets and dietary restrictions to be endlessly fascinating. Jewish kashrut laws? Fill me in. Seventh Day Adventists and their vegetarianism? Let's talk. Jungle tribes who have never seen a grocery store? I WANNA KNOW ABOUT IT. Seriously, I love that stuff, hence the enormous book on religion- not my own, nor has it ever been- that I'm currently reading). So this was a book I enjoyed reading, and apparently other people did too, if it was nominated for the Man Booker Prize, but apparently if you're the type of person who doesn't believe that curious people can find other cultures interesting, I guess stay away from it? :D


2. Pure: Inside the Evangelical Movement That Shamed a Generation of Young Women and How I Broke Free- Linda Kay Klein

This is an emotionally heavy book dealing with the purity culture that sprung up in evangelical churches in the 90's. I was raised Catholic and so I never had to deal with this (although Catholicism, like any religion, comes with its own strife! And hey, see! I'm interested in the behavioral standards of another group! IT HAPPENS, GOODREADS REVIEWER!!!), but I've had my issues with purity culture for as long as I've known about it.

I won't get into the deep pain felt by Klein and the women she interviewed, but this was really, really good and I hope it finds its way to those women who would most benefit from its message.


3. Thin- Grace Bowman

The painful memoir of a woman who suffered from anorexia, the long road back from it, and the aspects of it that still creep up even though she's in recovery.

The format- sometimes it's like a novel, sometimes it's more like an essay- made it a little hard to read at times, and if you're looking for answers on how to help someone you love who struggles with an eating disorder, this probably isn't your book. But if you're wanting to examine and understand what the mindset of someone with anorexia looks like, what it feels like to be them, the anguish and constant pressure they feel to be perfect, this is a good read.


4. Black Klansman: Race, Hate, and the Undercover Investigation of a Lifetime- Ron Stallworth

The true story of a police officer who spearheaded an undercover investigation into the most notorious American hate group.

Mr. Stallworth obviously couldn't go undercover himself- he is, of course, black- so he teamed up with a partner who played him while he himself did the phone work and the behind-the-scenes research. The book suffers a little for that- it's a seriously compelling story and absolutely needs to be told, but it's hard to keep up momentum when you're not the one performing the actions and the story in which you set the ball in motion is carried out by others (and now I'm wondering if the story would have been better served by being told in third person...). I'm looking forward to seeing the movie they're making of it. :)


5. Journeys: An American Story- Mark Tisch, Mary Skafidas

A collection of essays on the wonder and vitality that immigrants bring and have always brought to America. Definitely necessary in these trying times.

I loved hearing all the stories here. I wish I knew more about my ancestors- some of them came here in the 1890's from a farm near Bergen, Norway, but that's really all I know. Many of the authors know much, much more about the family members who started their family's story in America, and it was really moving to be able to experience their joy and pain at recounting those tales. Some people came here looking for a better future; others came because they were fleeing unimaginable horror. And while we've always been a nation made up of immigrants, a nation who benefits from immigrants, our attitude toward those same immigrants has often really sucked, to put it nicely. And for far too many people, it still sucks; I've seen it firsthand and it's gross.

So read this book and learn what so many people sacrificed in order to come to the US, and hug your local immigrant, because leaving everything behind (especially to come to a place where people mock you, mock your customs, mock your language, mock your progress with English, and scream at you to go home, like they themselves did anything other than be lucky enough to benefit from their own ancestors sacrificing everything to come here) isn't easy.


6. Rising Out of Hatred: The Awakening of a Former White Nationalist- Eli Saslow

This was a compelling read! Saslow covers the life story of Derek Black, whose father founded the internet's largest racist online community (I'm not going to dignify that community by naming it here). Derek was raised to be the movement's golden child, to inherit all the hatred and illogical, unscientific, racist claptrap that that movement pushes as fact. For years, he bought into it, stood at the forefront of the community and repeated all its garbage...until his world expanded and he started to question whether everything he'd grown up believing was a lie. (Narrator: It was, indeed, a lie.)

At times infuriating and other times hopeful, Saslow does a masterful job of portraying the slow exit of what was essentially an indoctrinated young man. He believed what he was taught until he stepped out into the wider world, and I'm ecstatic for him that he was able to move beyond the falsities his family of origin attempted to bestow upon him. May he continue to grow and and learn and question and keep fighting against the hatred he once tried to push. A fantastic book.


7. Where's My F*cking Latte? (and Other Stories about Being an Assistant in Hollywood)- Mark Yoshimoto Nemcoff

Yikes! I read this hoping to get some info out of it for something I'm writing, but these stories were a bit too out there for what I needed. Still...uh...yikes. Mostly fluff, but there are a few really sad stories in here.


8. The Skeptic and the Rabbi: Falling in Love With Faith- Judy Gruen

This was kind of neat. Gruen was raised in a not-terribly-religious household, but hey, things change, people stretch and grow and challenge themselves, and when she walks down the aisle, it's as someone who is prepared to live a strict Orthodox life, following the 613 commandments of the Torah, and this book details her journey from one point to the other.

I didn't always agree with her reasoning on certain things, and at the end, I felt as though a certain degree of judgment was coming through (there was one chapter in particular where she was discussing her modest dress and how random men would comment things like, "I wish more women dressed like you!" and "If more women dressed like you, we wouldn't have all the problems that we do!" I didn't find that as a point of pride; if someone said that to me, I'd be grossed out. I do tend to dress very modestly- not as a religious thing, it's just what I'm comfortable with- but those comments are a bit backhanded, praising the author while shaming other women, and I found her seeming pride in those compliments a bit remiss. How other women dress should be absolutely no one's concern but theirs. Wear a floor length skirt, wear a crop top; it's not my place or anyone else's to judge either. Everyone's journey is their own, and shaming others is no way to set an example), but I did enjoy reading the story of her increasing observance. I would've loved to hear more about her challenges raising her children in a tradition that she herself was not raised, but perhaps that's another book.


So that's what I read last month! I have about 200 pages or so to go in the hefty book on religion and then I'll move on to something...well, not lighter, but not as information-dense. I'm *still* dragging a bit from either that cold or who knows what else, but I'm definitely still not up to regular speed yet. :( Tomorrow should be a quiet day, so hopefully I'll get some rest and reading time.


What have you read lately?